


Becoming Ours

by decasquid



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: 5+1 Things, Andrew Minyard Has Feelings, Canon Compliant, Fluff, Healing, Light Angst, M/M, Sharing Clothes, Soft Boys, Soft Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-12
Updated: 2020-10-12
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:54:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,634
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26978404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/decasquid/pseuds/decasquid
Summary: Five times Andrew and Neil shared each other's clothes and One time they chose not to.
Relationships: Neil Josten/Andrew Minyard
Comments: 12
Kudos: 379





	Becoming Ours

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! First fic for this fandom!  
> I was having a mental health day and decided to write the story I wanted to read. This is incredibly self indulgent.  
> I think it turned out ok, so I thought I'd share!
> 
> TW: general anxiety, brief mention of the ravens, scars, allusions to sexual content, nothing more than the book.  
> Let me know if I missed anything!
> 
> Everyone is softer and healing, because that’s what I wanted. No one can stop me.

**1.**

The word rain isn’t enough to describe the torrential downpour and minor hurricane that Palmetto was experiencing. It was the same that the word stupid didn’t cover the absolute mistake Neil made when he decided to go for the run anyway. 

In his defense, it wasn’t raining as hard when he left in the morning. But now he had to cut his pace in half so his feet didn’t slip on the sidewalk when it wasn’t flooded. He was completely soaked and shivering slightly from the cold rain. He couldn’t tell the difference between his compression shorts and his skin. 

He slid a few times trying to make it back up the hill to Fox Tower before making through the front doors. He stood in the lobby for a second, trying to shake off any water on the mat before he walked over to the elevators, trying to be as careful as possible not to fall on the polished floor. 

As he waited for the elevator, he spotted the Maserati through the sheets of rain still parked in the front of the building looking like it hadn’t moved since last night. Either Andrew was skipping class today or classes were cancelled due to the weather. The more he surveyed the parking lot, it looked like none of the other cars had left either. 

Maybe the university had canceled classes for the day due to the hurricane.

The air-conditioning in the elevator made his skin prickle as he waddled down the hallway towards his dorm. He slipped the key out of the hidden pocket of his shorts and opened the door seeing Andrew sitting on the desk smoking out the window still in his pajamas while Kevin paced in the kitchen.

“You look like a drowned rat.” Andrew commented before he turned back to look outside. From where Andrew was perched, he had a decent enough vantage point to see Neil, in his orange reflective running gear, slip a few times up the hill. That bastard.

“It’s raining.” Neil slipped off his running shoes, pouring a puddle of water out onto the carpet before he peeled his socks off as well. Another shiver ran up his spine.

“It was stupid!” Kevin’s voice echoed from the kitchen, “What if you slipped and fell? Or get pneumonia from running in the rain!” When Kevin didn’t get a response out of Neil, he threw his hands up, “A fucking hurricane is moving through with flash flood warnings all throughout the area, do you even care?” 

Neil didn’t hear the rest of Kevin’s responsibility speech as he made it into the bathroom to try and minimize the amount of water he dripped on the floor.

One hot shower later, he slid quickly, covered in two towels into the bedroom to get dressed. 

He opened his dresser drawer and swore. He forgot to do laundry earlier in the week and hadn’t had a chance since they’ve had back to back games and practices. He could scrounge up a pair of obnoxious orange joggers that Nicky had bought for him to irritate Andrew and a pair of boxers and socks that would be better suited in the trash. 

He loaded his laundry basket up with the remaining dirty clothes hoping he’d find a shirt that would be reasonably clean enough to wear. 

That’s when he spotted it. 

The discarded black sweatshirt that Andrew had thrown on the floor yesterday to piss off Kevin. It was one of the two black sweatshirts that Andrew hadn’t ripped the sleeves off of yet.

The sweatshirt smelled like cigarettes and something so incredibly Andrew. While they both wore the same size, the hoodie was stretched in the chest and arms from Andrew’s frame and the ends of the sleeves were worn from being pushed up from hanging over his hands.

Neil relished in the hoodie for a second, feeling the soft fleece fabric inside the hoodie warm his cold arms. He found a small hole in the bottom seam that Andrew must have started playing with, as it wasn’t as frayed as he’s seen a few other holes become.

He’d wear it for a while. Just until his other clothes were washed and dried then he’d change out of it. Just until then.

He grabbed the basket of clothes before beelining out of the bedroom and down the dorm steps to the basement before Kevin could continue his time management speech including a laundry schedule that Neil should implement. After he commandeered two washers for the amount of clothes he needed to clean, Neil jogged back up the stairs to see Kevin walking towards the freshman dorm rooms. 

Neil froze in his steps as Kevin pounded on the freshmen’s door. The door was opened just a crack before Kevin armed his way in to stress “the importance of home exercises when practice was cancelled”. 

He snuck past Kevin with the same amount of energy he had used to evade his murderous father for years. 

One he made it safely inside the dorm room, Neil exhaled. Andrew had moved onto a bean bag chair with a video game paused on the tv. Andrew’s expression was neutral as usual, but there was a slight raise in his eyebrow. 

“Kevin’s lecturing the freshmen, and I didn’t want to get roped in.” Neil explained which seemed to satisfy him.

“He didn’t take his keys.” Andrew turned his attention back towards the video game, turning up the volume and unpausing it. 

Neil locked the door and moved to the kitchen to steal the remainder of the pot of coffee. He settled at the table for a moment spotting Kevin’s laptop. He opened it to see it needed a password. No doubt from Andrew using it “without Kevin’s permission”. 

“The passwords ‘exy2’.” Andrew commented without turning around. 

“Typical.” Neil snorted before logging in. He checked his email for confirmation that his classes were cancelled, and no additional homework was going to be assigned but to follow the syllabus for the next class.

Neil shut the laptop and moved over to the beanbag next to Andrew. 

“Thief.” Andrew commented not looking over at Neil. 

It took Neil a moment to realize what Andrew had said before he shrugged. “It was clean.” Neil said, “And I’ll give it back.”

Andrew didn’t say anything else for a while as he played the game. Neil sank further and further into the beanbag chair before he heard Andrew say, “You don’t have to.”

It took a moment for Neil to realize what Andrew was referring before he looked over at Andrew’s profile. He was about to say something before there was pounding at the door.

“Come on guys!” Kevin must have kicked the door from the way it shook on the frame. 

“No one’s home.” Andrew yelled before he turned up the volume of his game louder.

“Asshole!”

**2.**

It was the tail end of a brutal practice. They had won their last few games, but not by having the best technical skills but relying heavily on Andrew locking down the goal and the combos between Kevin and Neil. And while that was a decent enough tactic, it wasn’t one they could keep up. 

Tempers clashed between the freshmen and the upperclassman, resulting in various screaming matches along the court that sent Neil’s anxiety on edge. He heard yelling and bickering behind him as he focused on the play. 

It was just a three-way combo between two strikers and an offensive dealer. They’ve run that play multiple times that day, but this time it was going to be fully defended with Andrew in goal. 

Neil blocked out the sound, running as fast as he could push his legs when the play started. He received the pass in a decent opening and shot at the goal. Andrew blocked it away easily sending it halfway down the court behind him.

A hit to the back of his knees caused him to collapse forward. His knees slammed first before his hands caught himself as his racket went sliding just out of reach.

“Nice going, Wesninski.”

Neil looked up too quickly, having pushed himself too far during practice, and saw his vision swim. Neil blinked and saw Edgar Allen in front of him, dark black and red oppressive colors. He heard blurbs of French passing his ear, but he couldn’t make it out with his head swimming like it was. 

He had to get up. 

Neil pushed himself onto shaky feet seeing dark shadows of people around him. Someone, Jean, Riko, someone, reached out for him. 

“I can do it.” Neil pushed out, his voice heavier and thicker. He gripped his racket hard in his hand. He could feel the anxiety digging into his lungs attempting to steal the breath from him. He set himself up for the play again as the other shadows, blobs and shapes, reset.

The play started again, and Neil raced forward. Faster. He had to push himself faster.

He received the pass again, not having a clear opening and passing it back. He dodged the backliner and received the pass before he shot on goal. 

He didn’t see if he made it or not when he was slammed onto the court floor. 

Neil felt his body relax against the hit as he laid there, his vision floods of black and red. His arms ached like he could feel the knife marks Riko made hours, days, months, ago opening up again. The tops of his thighs aches from the racket pressing into them. Was it his? Or was it from Tetsuji, beating his legs to move faster.

He replied in French, knowing Jean would get equal punishment. “Let me try it again, I’ll get it right.” 

He didn’t hear a response as he tried to sit up, feeling a pressure on the back of his neck keeping him down. 

“Stop.” 

That wasn't right.

Neil blinked a few times, staring at the stands. 

Black and red seats lined the stadium. No. They weren’t. They were orange and white.

His eyes darted to the goal to find it empty. Andrew should be there. Always at his back. He looked over at the pair of shoes crouching next to him, black, always black, but with orange socks with fox paws peeking over the edges of the shoes.

“Those are mine.” Neil commented feeling the pressure on the back of his neck increase for a moment, before decreasing, allowing Neil to sit up.

The court was empty now, but Neil could see the outline of Wymack’s body on the edge of the locker room door.

“Did I make the shot?” Neil looked to find his racket wedged underneath of him. He pulled it out, seeing that it was fine, before setting it to the side.

He felt Andrew sigh, “Your one-track mind is getting old.” He waited, “No. You missed. And were tackled by twice-baked.”

“His name is Brian.” Neil corrected Andrew's refusal to use the freshmen’s names that Neil knew he remembered. 

“Doesn’t matter.”

Neil rubbed his face for a second, relaxing into Andrew’s touch. He waited for a moment before he moved to get up. Andrew kept his hand on the back of Neil’s neck as he stood up before dropping it.

“You know I was looking for those socks this morning.”

Andrew blinked at Neil slowly. A mix of hatred, amusement, and general tiredness. Three emotions Neil could work with. 

“I can ask Nicky to get you a pair if you like them.” Neil continued, feeling as the hatred continued to rise in Andrew’s gaze. “I do have to ask if you’re wearing the matching boxers too. Though I’d be more than happy to find out later if you don’t want to tell me.” 

“Shower.” Andrew grunted, ignoring Neil’s comment. “You smell worse than Kevin’s gym bag.”

“Can’t say I’ve smelled Kevin’s gym bag.” Neil let himself be pushed by Andrew slightly as they walked towards the locker room.

They showered quickly, sharing the same stall with, in Neil’s opinion, only a minimal kissing. Neil had slid on a pair of sweatpants before he felt a sock bounce off of his head. Neil looked up at Andrew who looked impassive, but the slight shine in his eye was telling. 

Neil tilted his head to the side and picked up the sock off of the ground. He took a few steps forward before Andrew threw the other sock. Neil caught this one out of the air before it hit his head. 

Andrew blinked for a second, darting to the socks in his hands. Neil raised his eyebrow at Andrew before he let a smirk slide onto his lips. A silent permission.

Andrew lunged forward, trying to grab a hold of Neil’s arms to get the socks as he took a few steps backwards to avoid the grab. Neil sidestepped Andrew’s arm quickly, and blocked the next. He held the socks above his head as he slid out from Andrew’s reach. 

But Andrew was a bit faster, as he turned on his heel and grabbed Neil’s wrist. Neil stopped, letting Andrew lower his arm and take the socks out of his hands. Andrew dropped the socks on the ground before he raised his eyebrow waiting for permission. 

And while a simple Yes would have sufficed, Neil loved instigating Andrew. “You still didn’t tell me if you’re wearing the matching underwear.”

“And if I am?” Andrew’s voice was low as he crowded up to Neil.

Neil didn’t get a chance to respond before a door slammed in the distance as Kevin’s voice echoed into the locker room asking if they were done because he wanted a ride back to the Tower.

Andrew stepped back out of Neil’s space before he grabbed the socks he dropped on the floor and stuffed them into the pockets of Neil’s sweatpants. Neil was frozen for a second as he calmed his racing heart before he grabbed a shirt and his bag. 

“I’d like it.” Neil responded as Andrew walked out ahead of him. Andrew didn’t respond, but the slight stop in his step was answer enough for Neil. 

**3.**

Neil’s lecture ran late and he was running back to Fox Tower to change quickly before going to evening practice. The freshmen had mouthed off to Wymack last practice and pissed him off more than usual. So, for “team bonding”, they were going on a run around Palmetto, much to everyone’s dismay. 

Well, a team minus Andrew and Aaron, who were both at their joint therapy session and would miss most of the town run and meet the team back at the gym to finish lifting weights. 

His phone buzzed as he pulled it out of his pocket still keeping his pace. Kevin was already at the court and chastising Neil for being late to meeting early. Kevin was no doubt annoying Wymack about the freshman’s lack of skill and tact. 

Again.

Not that Neil didn’t agree that there were obvious holes in the freshman’s skills. And trying to integrate them into an already solid line was difficult to find personalities that meshed, especially when lines were drawn mostly against him. But at least he wasn’t annoying Wymack about it. 

If that’s proper family bonding, he wouldn’t know. 

Neil barely had time to think as he ran the stairs of Fox Tower and into the dorm. He didn’t have time to think as he threw on his team sweatshirt he found on the floor and a clean pair of running shorts.

He made it to the gym with just enough time to get an earful from Kevin about proper stretching techniques before Dan arrived with the rest of the upperclassman.

“Laundry day?” Matt asked Neil as they stretched together. Neil narrowed his eyebrows and looked at his outfit. He didn’t have any stains on it. Matt just chuckled as they finished stretches.

The town run was fine. Nicky and a few of the freshmen trailed behind the pace while Neil, Kevin, and Dan headed up the front. They talked about a few changes to the lineup and the possibility of altering some of the plays for their upcoming game. 

Neil was barely winded when they made it to the gym, a striking contrast to the end of the line where they wheezed and coughed. 

“I doubt you learned anything about mouthing off.” Wymack said, leaning against the side of the gym, “But give me a solid yes coach and we’ll call it even.”

They echoed a yes coach and walked in to pair off on the machines. 

Aaron and Andrew were already working on their sets leaving Neil to pair off with Nicky. Neil had no self-preservation skills, but he wasn’t putting himself through another round of being paired off with Kevin.

Neil mostly let his mind wander as they moved through their workout. Lifting weights didn’t do anything for him. He felt the pull of his muscles but didn’t find any satisfaction in the soreness afterwards. 

“I love wearing Erik’s sweatshirts.” Nicky commented as they were doing deadlifts. “The gray one I wear around the dorm is his. It helps when I miss him, you know?” 

Neil didn’t respond. Not quite paying attention fully. “Are you seeing him over break?” Neil knew he was, but it was an easy enough topic to get Nicky to talk about. They finished their circuit early, splitting when Nicky went to take a shower before his next class. Neil forewent the shower at the gym, electing to take one when he was back in the dorms. 

Neil saw Andrew leaning against the wall outside of the gym with a cigarette already lit. Neil leaned on the wall next to him watching as a few more of the team had passed, but didn’t seem to notice or feel inclined to bother them.

Andrew finished the cigarette and stamped it out under his boot. “You have your own.” 

“My own what?” Neil squinted his eyes trying to read Andrew. He followed Andrew’s eyes to the sweatshirt he was wearing.

Neil opened his mouth to defend his hoodie before he realized. The sleeves of his team hoodie were worn down on the edges and the shoulders and chest were stretched far more than his own hoodie. It smelled unmistakably like Andrew’s cigarettes. Neil glanced at his reflection in the window to see the 03 large and white on the back underneath Minyard, large and white.

Oh.

“Wash it before giving it back.” Andrew commented before he left towards where he parked the Maserati in the gym parking lot.

Neil followed him watching Andrew’s walk. It was quicker, a bit more stompy than usual. He wasn’t angry, Neil decided letting a smirk cross his lips.

“You like it.”

“I hate it.” Andrew corrected quickly as he slid into the car.

Neil followed suit into the passenger’s seat. “You like it.” He repeated.

Andrew rolled his eyes. “At least they know where to return your corpse when your stupidity kills you.”

Andrew started the car and started driving back to the dorms. If Neil did his math right, they would have at least a half an hour before Kevin would be back in the room. 

“I like it.” Neil settled into the seat.

Andrew didn’t comment out loud, though he swore he thought the Maserati accelerated a bit faster.

Neil looked out the window to look at Andrew’s face and the grip he had on the steering wheel. “I like being yours.” 

He couldn’t be sure if the growl he heard was the Maserati or from Andrew. 

It didn’t really matter, Neil decided. 

**4.**

Andrew woke up before Neil for a change.

It was rare that Neil would sleep more than a few hours at a time. Partially due to the nightmares that would wreck the both of them, and the other part due to a deep ingrained skill to sleep in short bursts to keep attentive of their surroundings. 

But they were both sleeping better and longer. 

They shared the same dorm bed most nights, only separating when either one had bad nights. It wasn’t an easy transition, but it was one that had far more rewards than consequences.

Moments like this, Andrew decided, where he had the briefest moment between Andrew waking up and Neil’s natural early rise to watch Neil sleep in his arms. 

He had one arm slung over Neil’s waist with a hand resting on his scarred abdomen, a constant reminder that this was Neil and not any one of Andrew’s abusers. The other arm was tucked beneath the pillow where both his and Neil’s heads were sharing, quick to reach for one of his knives on the nightstand if needed. 

This wasn’t supposed to be possible.

It was supposed to be a hallucination brought on by the anti-psychotics he wasn’t supposed to take in the first place. Neil was supposed to be unattainable, say no to his advances, and leave him behind. He was nothing. A man that was supposed to be dead years ago.

But he was nothing but a loophole to even his own rules.

He stayed. 

He stayed for Andrew, which is a subject he can’t process and isn’t ready to talk about with Bee.

And Andrew hated him. 

He hated that Neil made him feel. He hated the fear that overtakes his heart by the concept of Neil leaving him, of losing something that shouldn’t have a right to exist.

But Neil was real. He was carved and hollowed out, but still so full and lively. He was a sleeping body in Andrew’s arms. A body lean and precise, with a past etched into his skin like Andrew’s own arms. Except his hair, ruffled waves of auburn that he couldn’t tame except with a bandana, or a headband, as he’s been doing recently. 

_Staring._ He told himself. 

But, he bargained mentally, this won’t happen again for a while.

So, he let himself, just that once. He closed his eyes, lulled by Neil’s breathing, and consumed.

He drank in the way Neil made him feel, the flood of panic and desire, mixed with hatred and fear. The feeling of the warm skin below his hands, and the knowledge that it was his with a question and an answer. He let the knowledge of Neil’s trust in Andrew wash over himself. 

He felt the panic start to raise in his chest violently as it tightened around his heart before he stopped.

He had to stop.

Because Neil sighed and nestled further into Andrew’s arms for a moment before he moved slowly but carefully out of bed in hopes that he wouldn’t wake up Andrew. Neil stretched silently before grabbing his clothes and leaving the dorm room. 

He would be gone for an hour or two depending on his mood. And if Andrew’s approximate time was correct, Kevin’s alarms would ring shortly to start his own morning ritual. 

Andrew rolled forward, finding the warm spot Neil left like he could absorb the warmth into his skin.

He closed his eyes, still feeling the tingling effects of his panic earlier, to entertain a reality where Neil was his. That Andrew would have the power and strength to entice Neil to skip his run. That Neil’s hidden smiles would be Andrew’s alone. His sharp words and ingrained violence would be Andrew’s to tame. 

A reality where Kevin wasn’t six feet away at all times.

If Andrew cared more, he’d rip the alarm clock out of the wall and smash it beneath his feet. It was unnecessary, and loud, and ruined any lingering remains of Neil with anger. Every morning. 6:13 because Kevin was the psychotic one, “ _set it to fucking 6:10 or 6:15 asshole. And they call me a monster.”_

Kevin didn’t have the same quiet gracefulness as Neil, and seemed to make more noise than humanly possible opening his dresser drawer. 

Andrew could stab him. He could make his problem disappear. There would be moral consequences, and Neil would be mad at him for a while. Wymack could cash in on the insurance policy that he opened on Kevin, and one of the snot nosed freshmen has a chance to be a starting striker. 

Before Andrew could fully act on his plot of whether it would be counted as first or second-degree murder, Kevin left the room. Thoughts for another day. He waited until he heard the dorm door shut, knowing Kevin was off to be an absolute nightmare to his history professors for forty-five minutes.

What kind of day is it? Andrew mentally asked himself. Not a bad day. He decided he had enough energy to get up, and get dressed, but he needed some coffee to function any further. 

Black pants, black socks, black armbands, Andrew fished through his drawer when he spotted it. The shirt he forcibly removed from Neil’s wardrobe. A once black, now grey, threadbare shirt that was two sizes too big for Neil and made him look smaller and weaker than both of them knew he was. 

He held the shirt in his hands, his head consumed with thoughts of Neil and his pouting face when Andrew had told him he threw it away.

He was already toeing the line of sheer personal destruction, so might as well let himself be eaten alive. 

It fit Andrew nicer, his shoulders broader and his arms filling out the sleeves. It was still a loose enough shirt that it didn’t feel like Andrew was suffocating in it, he’d let his thoughts suffocate him instead. 

He fisted the material. It was stupid. This was stupid. 

He sneered at himself in the mirror. He hated Neil. He hated himself. He hated his life. He hated this shirt. He hated Neil.

But the hate fizzled down his spine as the soft material hung over him. He checked his knives before he left the bedroom, finding coffee in the pot. Neil must have made it before his run because it was strong. If Neil retained anything from living with Matt, it’s how to brew decent coffee, and Andrew was thankful he didn’t have to put up with the watery blend Kevin makes nor the pumpkin flavor Nicky would always brew no matter the season. 

Andrew was leaning on the counter drinking his milky surgery coffee when the object of Andrew’s hate walked into the dorm. 

Neil was sweaty and breathing heavy meaning he must have run the stadium stairs instead of going for a distance run. Andrew glanced at the clock, only a 45 minute exercise routine. It must have been a decent mental health day for Neil too. 

“Any coffee left?” Neil asked, taking off his shoes and throwing his keys onto his desk. 

“No.” Andrew called to Neil who had ducked into the bathroom. Andrew scoffed before he started brewing another pot of coffee. He resumed his natural position, feet up on the coffee table, slowly descending lower and lower into the beanbag. 

That’s where Neil found him after his shower as Neil sat at his desk. It was quiet. Neil worked on math homework that was irritating with its lack of numbers and Andrew tried to decide if he felt like going to class or if he wanted to resume sitting for the rest of the day. Maybe the rest of his life. 

“I thought you threw it away.” Neil commented finally. Andrew’s eyes narrowed in his direction to find Neil not looking at him. That was more irritating than the comment. “I remember you saying I looked “stupid in it”.” 

“You did.” Andrew shifted so he could sit up a bit further.

Neil breathed out a snort but didn’t say anything for a second before he dropped his pencil. “Then we both agree.” 

Andrew wasn’t following Neil’s train of thought but Neil didn’t need to know that. 

The asshole looked over at Andrew with a small smirk and soft eyebrows that barely melted the intensity of his glacier eyes. “We both agree that you look much better wearing it than I did.”

Andrew ground his teeth and opened his mouth to retort before Kevin burst into the room. Their conversation died as Kevin asked Neil what he thought about the game they watched last night. Like they didn’t watch it together, in the same room, and talked about it heavily then. 

Andrew decided he’d have more peace and quiet in his criminology class. 

**5.**

Andrew didn’t drink as much as he used to. 

Partly because he didn’t need to chase the feelings of withdrawal with another substance that was at least legally obtainable. Partly because Bee told him he shouldn’t form a “habitual relationship” with a substance in place of a “healthy coping skill”. 

A frustrating majority of why he didn’t drink as much was the asshole next to him. Neil didn’t drink from his fear of losing control, and while he shared drinks with the foxes now, he still never drank so much that he would lose sense of himself. 

“I don’t know what’s waiting for me there.” Neil had said once on the roof one night, sharing the remains of a whisky bottle Andrew stole and a pack of cigarettes. “If I slip past all of the walls I have.” 

Still, every other weekend they went to Eden’s Twilight. Partly to be off of campus and let loose, and the other part to partake in cheap discounted booze on college nights. This weekend, Nicky had convinced the upperclassman to join them since Aaron was going to spend time with Katelyn and Nicky needed drinking partners.

Andrew didn’t care who joined them as long as they stayed out of his way, stayed out of his business, and found their own ride. He wasn’t a taxi service.

His opinion changed when he realized the perks of having a bigger group. The larger the group, the less of a chance everyone would procure their own chair. Andrew would always find one, and Neil would always give his chair up to one of the much drunker foxes. 

This left Neil to perch between Andrew’s legs on the stool at their high top table, and then refuse to move even when the foxes went to dance.

“This still ok?” Neil asked quietly, leaning back with respective distance between them.

Andrew hummed a yes into Neil’s ear, resting his chin on Neil’s shoulder taking full advantage of the height difference between them for once.

Maybe it was the two glasses of whisky warming his stomach, but this, and the lack of it being this, felt easier at Eden’s than anywhere at Palmetto. Maybe it was the security guarding the doors and watching the club, or the knowledge that most of the patrons were too drunk to notice anything other than the bottom of their drinks. Maybe it was Neil, dressed appropriately for once, not in workout clothes, with black boots, and dark jeans, and a fitted blue button down that did nothing to hide his glacier blue eyes.

Andrew mentally added the shirt to a list of things he hated about Neil. He wasn’t going to thank Reynolds for shit, but her guidance in Neil’s fashion department was a breath of fresh air. 

“Oh god.” Neil coughed a laugh, “Kevin is doing the safety dance.”

Andrew lifted his head to follow Neil’s gaze onto the dance floor. Kevin was throwing his arms around in the air and scooting around on the dance floor. A few other equally drunk patrons joined Kevin before Nicky was grabbing Kevin’s arms. It took Dan and Matt’s help to pull Kevin over to a laughing Allison and a snickering Renee who were filming him. 

“I’m surprised you know what that is.” Andrew commented, returning his chin to Neil’s shoulder.

“It was an integral part of my fucked up childhood. My mom taught me that,” Neil leaned his head back to look at Andrew better. “ _If your friends don’t dance, and if they don’t dance, well they are no friends of mine.”_

“Shut up.” Andrew pushed Neil’s back, as he easily moved forward, “Go, it’s your turn to refill the drinks before his-highness comes back and demands more vodka.” 

Neil made a show of picking up the tray and bowing slightly before heading back to the bar. Andrew wasn’t alone for long before the upperclassman sat loudly back at the table. 

“I can’t understand how you are so bad at dancing.” Nicky patted the side of Kevin’s face before ducking out of the way of Kevin’s glare.

“Because it’s not exy.” Dan had slung herself across Matt’s lap with both of her arms around his neck, “You dance like a white dad at a barbeque.”

Andrew ignored Kevin’s defense at the comments as the conversation turned to speculations about how Wymack would dance at a barbeque and various ways to trick him into supplying the answers. Before a new bet was formed, Andrew saw Neil walking back towards the table with a long wet spot down the front of his shirt. 

He raised an eyebrow as soon as Neil returned to the table to slide the full tray of drinks onto the table. “An accident.” Neil shrugged, pulling at the wet material adhering to his chest. “I think it’s a martini.” He wrinkled his nose like he could smell it over the stale beer and sweat smell the whole place emanated.

“Here,” Renee handed him a stack of napkins, “Dab, don’t rub, or the stain will set.”

“Or just wring it out into a glass and drink it.” Nicky commented, taking a shot. “Free liquor.”

“Don’t make me gag, Hemmick.” Matt coughed, like he imagined it. “I think I have an extra shirt somewhere in the truck.”

A twinge of jealousy sparked in Andrew’s chest that he had to smash down immediately. “Here.” Andrew shrugged off the black flannel he was wearing over an equally as black t-shirt. Neil looked at the shirt in Andrew’s hands like it was the holy grail. 

He nodded quickly, grabbing the shirt and headed to the bathroom to change. While Andrew was well acquainted with Neil’s scars, the rest of the foxes only had a vague idea of what was under his shirt.

After a minute, Neil returned to the table wearing the black flannel with his wet blue shirt hanging in his fist. 

Andrew has made a lot of mistakes in his life. 

The flannel was a bit tight on Andrew’s shoulders, but fit Neil’s shoulders well enough. Neil had buttoned it up most of the way leaving a few open at the top like his blue shirt. The worst part of all, was that Neil had rolled the sleeves up so they hung just below his elbows exposing the black armbands that matched Andrew’s.

Now that Neil was in all black, his eyes seemed to glow impossibly bright. He looked sharp and dangerous, charming and sly. It made Andrew want to take him outside, alone, and say yes as many times as he could. It made Andrew want to stab him in the chest repeatedly.

“What?” Neil asked, like the spawn of Satan himself. He was standing awkwardly to the side of Andrew, just out of reach to pull Neil closer to him without being obvious.

“Hot damn.” Nicky cheered, “Steal that shirt more often.” He whistled, bringing Kevin to attention from his drink for a second. “My shirt?” Kevin slurred before he returned back to his drink. 

“Imagine if you’d given him a shirt, babe.” Dan snorted as Matt laughed loudly, “It’d look like a dress on him, not that he couldn’t pull it off.”

Renee smiled, “You do look nice Neil.”

Andrew wanted to slaughter them all. 

“I mean we can all agree,” Allison looked at her fingernails, like she had been doing that the whole time before she locked eyes with Andrew. “Neil looks the best in Andrew’s clothes, though Andrew might have a different perspective seeing Neil out of them.”

There was a moment. A pause where the air seemed to be siphoned out of the room. Then the table scattered. Nicky dragged Kevin away from the drink he was losing himself into, while Matt and Dan darted away grabbing at Renee’s arms. Allison was the last to get up keeping her gaze on Andrew before she too disappeared from the table. 

Andrew was in the middle of plotting their deaths when Neil interrupted it with a snorted laugh. He had a bit of color blushing his cheeks as he took a step closer to Andrew and shook his head. “It’s like they haven’t seen me wearing your clothes before.”

Andrew ground his teeth together watching Neil run a hand through his hair before he cocked his hips towards him and smirked. That asshole. Neil took a step forward right within Andrew’s reach. Taking the opportunity and Neil’s wiggle of his eyebrows, Andrew grabbed a hold of Neil’s belt loops and dragged him closer, back to his original position in between Andrew’s legs.

Andrew pressed his forehead against Neil’s back for a moment before he resumed resting his chin on Neil’s shoulder. They were slowly and slightly rocking back and forth, more so due to Neil’s restless energy than any kind of dancing. 

“I have to know.” Neil asked, it was low, but Andrew could hear it. “Was this your plan? Somehow, get me wearing all black to match you?”

While it wasn’t above Andrew to plan something as convoluted, he had no part in this. “Even if I could plan on when you will make a fool out of yourself, I’d have better luck with the lottery.”

“We could go to the casino next time.” Neil hummed like he was thinking about it, “I doubt I’m any sort of lucky, but I’m willing to give it a shot.”

Images of Neil in a fitted tuxedo, dark and dangerous with his facial scars and icy eyes, filled Andrew’s brain. They’d be a sharpened pair, scaring off the unwanted drifters in the casino. Andrew would play Blackjack, he’s always been good at counting cards, but Neil would play Poker and lie his way to millions. Maybe they’d play dice, Andrew thought of briefly, Neil blowing on the dice in Andrew’s hands. 

The image was so sharp and clear, he had to destroy it immediately. Instead he answered with, “I think you have enough blood money.”

“I might have some sway with the loan sharks.” Neil smiled like he had been having the same shared thoughts as Andrew. “Or I’d have some outstanding family debt I’ll have to pay.”

The images of the casino shifted to a dark basement filled with stale beer and cigarette smoke. Knowing Neil’s history, “That’s more likely.”

“Disappointing.” Neil said like he had desperately wanted to go to the casino in his head before he leaned back to look at Andrew better. “You know, you can dress me any time, I told you that.” Andrew didn’t respond fast enough before Neil added, “Especially if you look at me like that when you do.”

Andrew sucked in a breath trying to calm his heart racing, cursing Neil to hell in every thought. He was about to suggest that they go out for a smoke break when he heard Neil swear.

“You don’t happen to have another shirt?” Neil exhaled, “Kevin just vomited on himself.” 

**+1**

Well, that didn’t go as planned, Andrew thought to himself as he woke up.

The plan was to give Neil a break. 

The freshmen have been ruthless and needy as the spring tournament was about to start. Their classes were becoming harder with more information and tests before the end of the semester. The upperclassmen were practically guilting Neil into hanging out while they still had time. And of course, the junkie had been throwing himself into practices, not sleeping enough, even less than usual. 

He was a ticking time bomb, Andrew had seen it, ready to explode in a flash of sharp words and violence on whoever set off the fuse.

The plan was to take Neil away. 

The plan was to drive Neil to the closed waffle house parking lot near Columbia and let him loose. To let Neil scream at him if he wanted to. If Neil wanted to throw punches he could. Andrew could take it. He knew he could. 

He didn’t plan on Neil asking him a yes or no. He didn’t plan on pressing Neil onto the hood of the Maserati. He didn’t plan on the hours they spent in each other’s company, realizing how little time they’ve been able to spend together.

“It’s too late to drive back now.” Neil breathed into Andrew’s neck. 

“The house is closer.” Andrew agreed. 

The innocent intentions of sleeping were thrown away before the door to the house was shut.

There was no Aaron to make snide comments in passing or gag when he entered a room. No Nicky to be overly supportive and offer advice that neither of them wanted to give or receive. No Kevin to overhear the sounds that Neil made when Andrew took him apart.

Andrew had never been more content that something didn’t go as he planned. 

A new character development, he thought to himself, Bee would be proud. But he wouldn’t, couldn’t, tell her the circumstances of the development. 

He couldn’t tell her he came to this realization watching the morning light filter through the curtained windows of the bedroom like it was shining only for Neil. That he felt himself get lost just watching Neil’s chest rise and fall gently, knowing Neil was awake and watching him. Andrew liked to outline the distinct shapes of Neil’s scars, an iron burn mark, a bullet wound, road burn, and dozens of crisscrossing knife marks scattered around his abdomen not to mention his arms or his face. 

That he reached a new clarity watching the white bed sheet slowly shift down Neil’s stomach barely keeping him modest. They were both naked, drinking the sights of skin in the morning light instead of the glimpses they got under the cover of darkness. It was an equal exchange, Andrew understood that well enough to keep the panic from overtaking his thoughts. Andrew hated it, but he didn’t want it to stop. Reynolds was right, he did like Neil better without his clothes.

By the time Andrew’s eyes had migrated up to Neil’s face, he made contact with the infinitely blue eyes staring at him. Neil made a soft sighing sound, barely a whispered, “Hi.” 

Andrew grunted back, fighting off the urge to brush the hair away from Neil’s eyes and the equal urge to bash Neil’s face in with his fist. 

Neil stretched, the bed sheet sliding lower and lower. Andrew watched as it descended before pulling his eyes back up. Neil smiled that dopey smile that Andrew hated as he nestled back into the pillow. His face grew softer, “Thank you.”

“Shut up.” Andrew murmured back, but the words held no ice or heat. It sounded too soft coming out of his mouth, like if he spoke louder Neil would shatter in front of him. A manifestation of everything Andrew feared and everything he desperately wanted.

Neil puffed out a breath before sitting and stretching his shoulders. It was intoxicating to look at the muscles moving along his back shifting like how Andrew imagined they would under his shirt. 

He watched Neil look around the room before his face pinched. “Any chance you packed some clothes?”

Andrew blinked at him, he didn’t. There were clothes in the house, both from Neil and Andrew over the summer, and the other half of Nicky’s wardrobe. Even Kevin had left clothes in the house for after their nights at Eden’s. Still, Andrew answered the question, “No.”

Neil sighed dramatically before he threw himself back into bed. “Guess we’ll have to stay in bed all day, since I’m not sure where you threw my clothes.” 

Oh, Andrew stopped himself from reacting outwardly, letting the spark of excitement fizzle out deep within his chest. Neil’s putting on a show. The glint in Neil’s eyes, the flailing of his limbs, the small square of fabric pulling downward lower and lower, it was all a rouse.

“A compelling argument.” Andrew replied finally, causing a smirk to grow across Neil’s face. 

“I can be more enticing.” Neil glanced over at Andrew with his eyebrow raised sliding over ever so slightly closer. Not close enough, but if Andrew had any hopes of staying coherently thinking, it was far enough.

“It’s funny you think you were enticing to begin with.” Andrew had pulled the covers further up on himself burrowing down into the bed. 

Neil pouted for a second rolling closer asking with an eyebrow raise each inch he moved closer. They were getting better at their facial cues, the slight micro expressions shared between them that said millions. They still needed verbal consent, something both of them agreed on, but this, getting closer, a hand in their hair, was ok to be silent.

Andrew sighed loudly shifting out the side of his covers to grab a hold of Neil and bring him closer. Neil was warm and pliable, moving wherever Andrew wanted him to go. Neil ended up tucked under Andrew’s arm, his head resting on his chest.

Staying in bed all day wasn’t practical.

They were regrettably human and needed food and bathrooms. Andrew knew the dampers he had on his panic wouldn’t last all day, even with Neil curled up next to him, drifting to sleep. Palmetto and the responsibilities, probably blowing up both of their phones in the living room where Andrew put them, would be there. 

But Andrew could pretend.

**Author's Note:**

> Alternative title:  
> 5 times Kevin is used as a plot device and one time I DIDN’T
> 
> Thanks for reading!


End file.
